the law does not allow for posthumous jurisprudence. or lesbian wagon sex.

[wizened_cynic]

There, I wrote it. It had to be done, and apparently, today was the day for it. I'm telling you right now that there is, unfortunately, no lesbian wagon sex, so don't even ask.

OREGON TRAIL AU ZOMG

Somehow the truth slipped out and it became known that Lorelai Gilmore's husband did not die of rheumatic fever as she'd claimed. In fact, Lorelai Gilmore did not have a husband at all; her daughter was borne out of wedlock and she had been shunned by her family. Now she was traveling west with her little daughter, the two of them alone in their little ramshackle wagon.

"You stay away from her, Alexandra," Pa ordered when he learned of this. "Stay away from that woman and her daughter, do you understand?"

"Yes, sir," Alex replied, without thinking, but when Rory Gilmore came to her the next morning and asked to look at her books, Alex let her. The child touched the leather spines reverently, her eyes wide with awe. "Would you like to borrow one?" Alex asked in spite of herself.

Rory looked as if she could not believe her luck. "Could I?"

Alex took The Five Little Peppers and How They Grew from her trunk and pressed it into the hands of the tiny girl. "You may take as long as you want."

"Thank you! Thank you thank you thank you," Rory said, her delight almost palpable. She hugged the book to her chest and hopped down from the wagon, running to show her mother, Alex supposed.

Rory returned two days later with the book. Alex was startled; even her best student in Independence had taken a week to finish it.

"I was wondering, Miss Cabot," Rory said shyly, weaving a strand of hay between her fingers, "whether you could perhaps lend me another?"

Alex could feel Pa's disapproving gaze on her from where he stood in the distance, talking to the other pioneers about livestock and weather conditions and the homestead they were promised hundreds of miles away.

Still, the child had a gift, and it would be a shame to let it go to waste. "Of course," Alex said. "Have you read Alice's Adventures in Wonderland?"

A few days later she was washing Pa's shirts when she saw the book lying against a rock on the riverbank. She wiped her hands on her pinafore and reached for it, and a voice behind her called, "Excuse me, that's my book."

Alex turned around sharply, only to face Lorelai Gilmore. Based on what she'd heard from the others, Alex expected Lorelai to exotic and dangerous and desperately beautiful, but the woman standing before her was not too different from Alex herself. She was pretty, with strong fine features and pouty red lips, but her hair was wild and her skin was brown and when she smiled there were lines at the corners of her eyes.

"So it's you," Lorelai said. "The amazing Miss Cabot. From what Rory told me, I would've expected you to be able to walk on water."

Alex frowned, unable to decide whether she should be insulted.

"Thank you," Lorelai continued. "I know you've heard rumors and I've seen how your father looks at me and Rory."

"Well," was the best response Alex could come up with. She thought for a moment and then cleared her throat. "Rory is a very good reader."

Lorelai's smile widened at the mention of her daughter. "She's brilliant," she said proudly, and if Alex weren't so inclined to agree she might have scoffed. "Which is why I appreciate that you're giving her a chance. You were a schoolteacher?"

"Yes," Alex answered. She waded back into the river to finish scrubbing Pa's shirts.

"You didn't like teaching?"

"No, I loved it." Alex paused, perplexed by the question. "Why would you think that?"

"Well, why didn't you stay in Independence? Why go on this godforsaken journey that seems to go on forever?"

"My father."

"Ah. Yes," Lorelai said.

There was something like pity in her voice, and Alex's anger flared. "Not everybody can do what you've done," Alex said pointedly, "and to be very honest, I doubt if many people want to."

Lorelai appeared to be more amused than offended, which only furthered Alex's irritation. "If you say so, Miss Cabot." The way she drew out Alex's name made Alex shiver, even though it was the middle of an August afternoon. "I'll see you later."

Lorelai picked up Alex's book and sauntered off, free, and for a moment, Alex was almost envious.

Some extra background: Alex is actually going to Oregon to marry Robert, whom she has never met. In the longer, in-my-head version of this, Lorelai makes Alex come to terms with what she has always known: men suck, let's have lesbian wagon sex.

Oh, and Arthur Branch is Pa.