wizened_cynic: (jesus-san meets kitty-chan)
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[livejournal.com profile] silverturtle87 had a lot of questions. I had a lot of time, because my doctor's appointment isn't until 4:00 pm. This happened.



What first inspired you to write?

I think in Grade 3 I had to write a Halloween story and I wrote one about a family of skeletons and one of the kid skeletons lost his rib bone. He ended up finding it in the turkey. I remember my teacher laughing and telling me it was a clever story, and my brain was all, HEY THIS IS COOL. I CAN WRITE SHIT AND MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH. And then in Grade 4 or 5, my brother got put into ESL lessons so my parents were all anxious and hired him an English tutor. I took lessons as well because they were afraid I would get put into ESL, which was never going to happen because unlike my brother, I actually read, so anyway the tutor would give me homework every week and it would be like, "Write a story!" and I would write lots of lengthy pointless stories and it was almost like therapy because I named all the evil characters after the mean girls at school who were picking on me.

So I guess I was inspired to write for attention-seeking purposes AND for revenge.

What are your very favorite types of stories to write?

I used to like to dial up the angst, but in recent years I prefer to write short, light-hearted fics. Crackfics. Babyfic. Something that would put me in a better mood if I read it on a really really shit day. I really like reading fics that are funny but sad at the same time, and I like to think I tend to write those a lot as well. And that I'm good at that.

Of all your fics which one do you like best and why?

I don't know. After a while I kind of hate them all equally. There are aspects in each one that I like, but at the same time there's always something that didn't work in each of them. So I don't have a favorite. I love and resent them all equally.

Which one do you think is the weirdest?

3 Stephanies and a Lauren is pretty fucking weird.

Are there fandoms you were in that you didn't write fic for, if so which ones and why no fic?

I was really into The Office fandom back in the day. Around 2006-2007? Never wrote anything for it. Just couldn't get the voices right. There were some AMAZING writers in that fandom and they wrote everything I wanted to read, so I didn't need to!

I can't remember what others. X Files. I was twelve or thirteen then. Hadn't even seen most of the show.

What's your favorite type of story to read?

I will pretty much read anything as long as it's well-written. I prefer fics that have some element of humor. I cannot deal with straight-up angst anymore. I'm old. I like to read the same kind of fics that I like to write. Funny and sad at the same time. One of my favourite books is This is Where I Leave You, by Jonathan Tropper. If you read it, you'll know what I mean.


What's the hardest part of writing a story for you?

Starting. Continuing. Finishing. Thinking of a title. THEY ARE ALL HARD. WRITING IS DIFFICULT BUSINESS.

What was the challenge you're most glad you participated in?

I never do challenges because I can never finish them on time. I've learned my lesson the hard way. Ficathons are not feasible. I suppose the biggest challenge I ever had was to finish the Gingerbread Cookie fic. It dragged on for 8 months and for a while I didn't think I would finish it ever. But I did! And it turned out okay, though not the way I had imagined it from the start.

Do you like writing anything that comes to mind or do you prefer having a prompt of some sort?

The former. I actually don't like prompts much because I have a hard time actually, you know, including the prompt into the fic. I think my brain just doesn't like being told to do something.

What's your favorite pairing?

Alex/Lorelai. I still ship them, though I don't think I can ever write Claire again. It's just, I'm in such a different point in my life from I was then that I can't really quite get my head into that universe again.

Also, not a pairing-pairing, but I love Chad and Alex as siblings. Chad adores his sister so fucking much, he just shows it in the most INAPPROPRIATE way possible. And Alex, so long-suffering, putting up with Chad's shenanigans because, well, blood is thicker than water. But as Chad will say, jizz is thicker than blood.

What's a pairing you ship but didn't expect to like?

*cough* Rossi/Prentiss. I have never shipped JJ/Emily. I don't know why. I just never saw the chemistry between them. I like them both separately, but not together. Actually I kind of dislike JJ after she came back from maternity leave and was all motherly and shit. I would've thought I shipped Hotch/Prentiss, but somehow I found myself on the Rossi/Prentiss ship and can't get down. Like, I know THAT IS PAPA GIRARDI, it is WRONG, but ... the writing. Why so good? This is exactly what happened to me and Jim/Pam, back in 2006.

What do you absolutely hate to see done in a fic?

Shitty dialogue. The incorrect use of the subjunctive. Excessive declarations of love. Homeric epithets. One weird thing that bothers me --- but which I can live with --- is when the fic starts with the narrator using his/her full name. E.g. "Emily Prentiss went home, tired." I don't know why this bothers me so much, but it does. SHE KNOWS HER GODDAMN LAST NAME, the READER knows her goddamn last name, WHY DO YOU NEED THAT?

Who is your favorite character to write? Why?

Chad. Because I pretty much can make him to anything and say anything and go as insane/vulgar/offensive as possible and IT WILL STILL BE PERFECTLY IN CHARACTER.

If you could only write one story for that character what story would you tell?

I think I've already written a fic about the awesome wonderful powers of Chad's penis. And how it changed the lives of those around him forever.

If I had to write one story for Alex Cabot, however, it would be the one where one day she looks up and sees Lorelai (this is the Claire universe) and she remembers the first time they met and how Lorelai wasn't important to her then. She was just another person. And the thing is you never know who is going to end up being important to you. You just have to see.



Okay, that didn't take as long as I thought it would. Maybe I should, I don't know, brush my teeth or something.

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