wizened_cynic (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wizened_cynic) wrote2010-12-02 05:15 pm
wizened_cynic) wrote2010-12-02 05:15 pm
I want you to have something I don't need anymore
Holy shit, I haven't been here in forever!
I'm still alive (barely) and am three exams down. Two more to go.
On a happy note, I did not fail the awful oral submissions thing where I was almost in contempt of court. I didn't get a great mark, but I ain't complaining, considering I seriously thought I would fail because I wasn't allowed to argue LAW so I had no idea how they were supposed to assess me.
On an even happier note, I totally motherfucking pwned my plea in mitigation for Criminal Litigation. Like, honestly, it was the punched-it-in-the-face-and-then-got-its-girlfriend-pregnant-by-mystical-powers-of-fpreg kind of pwned.
To celebrate my survival of this insane term, I'm bringing back, for the holidays, the BEST FIC MEME EVER.
Rules:
1. Pick a card on someecards.com. Any card.It doesn't even have to anything to do with Christmas or Hanukkah or whatever you're into.
2. I will write something for you based on that e-card. I pick the pairing/characters, so you may end up with Alex/Lorelai, or you may end up with Demon Hunter!JJ, or you may end up with CHAD.
3. I actually filled out all the prompts last time I did this, so there's a good chance I will be able to do the same this time!
I have no idea how many of you are still around, but I hope I'll get a couple of prompts at least! I feel Christmasy! And Chad-dy! God, it's never good when I feel Chad-dy.
And now I will watch SVU and relax. Shut up, I know I make bad choices. (But OMG! NEAL IS JUMPING SHIP! THERE IS A TINY TINY TINY POSSIBILITY THAT THE BLOODY SHOW WOULD FINALLY END AND I CAN BE FREEEEEEEEEEEE.)
BEST FIC MEME EVER! DO IT!!!!!!
I'm still alive (barely) and am three exams down. Two more to go.
On a happy note, I did not fail the awful oral submissions thing where I was almost in contempt of court. I didn't get a great mark, but I ain't complaining, considering I seriously thought I would fail because I wasn't allowed to argue LAW so I had no idea how they were supposed to assess me.
On an even happier note, I totally motherfucking pwned my plea in mitigation for Criminal Litigation. Like, honestly, it was the punched-it-in-the-face-and-then-got-its-girlfriend-pregnant-by-mystical-powers-of-fpreg kind of pwned.
To celebrate my survival of this insane term, I'm bringing back, for the holidays, the BEST FIC MEME EVER.
Rules:
1. Pick a card on someecards.com. Any card.It doesn't even have to anything to do with Christmas or Hanukkah or whatever you're into.
2. I will write something for you based on that e-card. I pick the pairing/characters, so you may end up with Alex/Lorelai, or you may end up with Demon Hunter!JJ, or you may end up with CHAD.
3. I actually filled out all the prompts last time I did this, so there's a good chance I will be able to do the same this time!
I have no idea how many of you are still around, but I hope I'll get a couple of prompts at least! I feel Christmasy! And Chad-dy! God, it's never good when I feel Chad-dy.
And now I will watch SVU and relax. Shut up, I know I make bad choices. (But OMG! NEAL IS JUMPING SHIP! THERE IS A TINY TINY TINY POSSIBILITY THAT THE BLOODY SHOW WOULD FINALLY END AND I CAN BE FREEEEEEEEEEEE.)
BEST FIC MEME EVER! DO IT!!!!!!
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Yeah, I don't know what the shit it is. A bit of Claire mixed in with Seasons 10 and 11 of SVU and a whole lot of meta.
***
Some days Alex is acutely aware of how much she hates her job.
This is one of those days.
Not that she's ever considered Stars Hollow's Founder's Day celebration to be of particular significance to her, but she would take Taylor's histrionics and Kirk's general weirdness over listening to a detailed account of a twelve-year-old prostitute being raped and strangled, then thrown into the East River.
"We have to cut him a deal," Alex tells the detectives after the interview. One of the perps is willing to flip on his partner if it means getting to stay off Death Row.
It's a flimsy case; no eyewitnesses, no DNA, nothing conclusive on the forensic front.
Olivia stares at her incredulously. Elliot slams the door shut behind him as he storms out of the room. Cragen just looks tired.
Some days, Alex really hates her job.
She's on her way back to the office when she receives a text from Lorelai: Hitting the founder's day punch now. Expect a drunk dial soon.
Another one arrives moments later. No, wait, even better- IM GONNA DRUNK FACETIME YOU
Alex laughs to herself, even though it's probably wrong and inappropriate (god, if Olivia and Elliot were here, there would be even more incredulous stares and door-slamming).
Bring it on, Alex texts back, even though she'd made her opinion clear that Facetime is the invention of the devil.
("Steve Jobs is the devil?" Lorelai gasped the first time Alex had said it. "My mom's not going to be thrilled that her throne's been stolen.")
The text that arrives next is gibberish interspersed with a fair amount of punctuation, so Alex assumes the Founder's Day punch has kicked in and Lorelai is already too wasted for drunk Facetime.
Just like that, her day is a little better, notwithstanding dead children and making deals with murderers. It's probably not right, and it's probably not fair, but Alex isn't trying to save the world anymore (she's done that already, and failed) (but she's managed to save herself); she's just trying to do her job to the best of her ability, and then go home to Lorelai.
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Alex isn't trying to save the world anymore (she's done that already, and failed) (but she's managed to save herself)
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You are very wise indeed to have stopped at Season 6. The show is such shit now I don't even have words to describe it. Yet I still watch. YES I HAVE A SICKNESS BUT YOU KNOW THAT ALREADY.
Alex in Seasons 10 and 11 and Alex of the earlier seasons are two completely different people, mostly due to shitty writing and SM's inability to hide the fact that she hates her job. It's kind of awesome, actually. So really this ficlet is just thinly-veiled commentary on that. With bonus drunk Facetime.
Oh, and just in case you or I or both of us disappear for the holidays, HAPPY (EARLY) BIRTHDAY!
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I'd love to see Lorelei's drunk "Facetime" posts. Can you imagine?
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I have no idea if you can record Facetime conversations or not, but if you could, Alex would so record that shit and then hold it over Lorelai's head forEVER :D :D
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I'm glad you liked this! thank you <3